Video of the Week – Cats vs. Zombies

Happy Halloween! This is my favorite time of the year because I get to watch humans put on ridiculous outfits and beg for food. Today’s video of the week is really important to understand. It is called “Cats vs Zombies – Batteries.” Now there are two handlers in this video. One is the hero and the other is the villain. It’s always important to have hero handlers like the female in this video who will do everything humanly possible to accommodate your needs. Be sure to give handlers like this lots of rewards, like affection, to train them to continue to stick up for your rights. On the other side is the villain – the male in this video. All he cares about is himself. But there are ways you can get even when you have a handler like this. You can cough up a hairball in his shoe, drag his tie into the litter box, or rub hair on his suit just before he goes to a big presentation. As it is Halloween, I should speak up about that Halloween video my handlers made. I just want to make it clear that I had nothing to do with that video. In fact, while they were creating it I was busy napping in order to prepare for my quest to take over the...

Video of the Week – Cat Saves Boy From Dog

I know that this video has already made the social media rounds. But this is an exemplary display bravery and fearlessness. And, when cats foster such goodwill with humans, it furthers my quest to rule the world. Earning the affection  of humans will make it easier my fellow felines to help me accomplish my goals. Cats are powerful and intelligent. And when the need arises to save a human, they will spring into action (hopefully with the added benefit of additional wet food later). This video is titled, “My Cat Saved My Son.” These are the kind of cats I am recruiting for my followers – fearless, loyal, and ready for action. This cat deserves a medal of...

Video of the Week – Cat Parkour

Trying to rule the world is a tough job. It takes a lot of brains and talent. It also means that I must identify other talented cats that I can recruit. I’m not into the plethora of cutesy “nyan cat” videos on YouTube. They serve a purpose, but not my purpose. When I peruse YouTube, I’m looking for cats that display brain power and incredible talent. It’s not an easy job. I find myself having to surf through tons of “eHarmony cat lady” videos, so called “cat fails,” and an endless array of cats chasing laser dots without success in catching it. But I do sift through these to find the true diamonds in the rough and that’s the purpose of this weekly column. Every Friday I present a new video that demonstrates the superiority of the cat species. These aren’t “cutesy felines.” They are “fearless felines.” Our first video to launch this column is a parkour cat named DIDGA. DIDGA is fearless and does a great job of demonstrating why cats rule. Parkour Cat –...

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